If you’re thinking of popping the question but you’re in a long-distance relationship, you might be thinking about doing it over FaceTime (or Zoom, Skype, or whatever you use to chat).
Unfortunately, unlike regular proposals, this isn’t something with a long history and tradition that you can read about and learn from. How, exactly, do you propose via video link?
Luckily, the coronavirus quarantine meant that virtual proposals (and even virtual weddings for some couples) have become slightly more commonplace.
Here are 5 ways to make an unforgettable proposal over video chat. Don’t forget to hit record!
1. A scavenger hunt in their house

This one requires a bit of set-up, but it’s worth the effort!
The idea is that you place notes around their house/apartment in non-obvious places, with one clue leading to the next. Finally, the last clue will lead them to the big question (and perhaps also the ring).
So how are you going to do this from hundreds (or thousands) of miles away? There are two ways:
- Plant the notes when you visit them – might work if you can get rid of them for an hour or so!
- Involve their friends and family – one of them can distract your S.O. for a bit whilst another plants the clues
Be careful to put the clues in places where they won’t look until you tell them to. Then schedule a video call (tell them it’s a special date night and to dress up!).
Once you’re both logged in, tell them you have a scavenger hunt for them and reveal where you’ve hidden the first clue.
2. Leave a message in your favourite nature spot

Going to your favourite nature spot – such as beach or park – to ‘hang out’ virtually is such a cute date idea, and it becomes even better when you throw in a proposal…
Write the words somewhere in your favourite spot. Then go a little way off, dial in to your video call and walk until you ‘discover’ the message.
Here are some places you could leave the message:
- In the sand
- On a tree (in chalk)
- On a wall
- In the snow (if you want to get really creative, build a snowman and put a ‘will you marry me?’ sign around its neck)
3. Get their friends and family to help

This idea was inspired by this incredibly sweet proposal story!
Get your friends and family together for a group call and ask them each to make a sign with one word, forming the message ‘will you marry me?’ (or whatever phrase you want to use). When the time comes, ask them to hold up their signs!
Tip: as the story linked above shows, coordinating a message when you’re not sure what order people will be displayed in can be a little difficult. To fix this, ask the first person to hold up their sign first and then the second, and so on. This solves the issue of trying to decipher a scrambled message all at once.
4. Hide the message in plain sight

It’s quite a thrill to know that your partner already has the proposal message in their hands… but they just don’t know it yet.
How can you make this happen? Hide it in plain sight, in something you send to them in advance.
There are so many variations on this idea, here are just a few:
- Send them a framed photo with the message on the back of the photo – hidden by the frame
- Hide the message in a teddy
- Use the lemon juice invisible ink trick on one of your love letters
When the time is right, tell them to look in the place where you’ve hidden the message. You could either just say there’s a secret message for them – or you could come up with an elaborate excuse to get them to look there. For example, you could say you think you wrote an important phone number on the back of the photo and now you can’t remember it…
5. Just ask them!
Sometimes the simplest ideas are the best! If none of the above seems right for you, why not just cut to the chase and ask? 🙂

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